True Grit

Hello, avid movie goers. I hope this holiday season finds you well, and you got everything your heart desired for Christmas. And of course, that you managed through family get togethers relatively unscathed. But enough jokes. Oh, and not to worry- my 2010 top 10 list is coming. I still need to see Black Swan before I can make my final selections.
So, we come to True Grit. As I'm sure you all know, True Grit is based on a novel, which has previously been adapted into a movie starring John Wayne. The filmmakers claim this version is closer to the book than the other adaption. I haven't seen that or read the book, so I'll take their word for it. This film is directed by the brother team of Joel and Ethan Coen. They are among my favorite directors in Hollywood. The reason for that is they have made a career out of defying convention. What this means is that they rarely do things the way other filmmakers do, but I've found that their doing so almost always enhances the quality of their films. Like for example, my favorite Coen Brothers movie- No Country For Old Men. In that film, they use diegetic sound. That means that all the sound in the movie is something the characters would encounter. No soundtrack. No score. It's ballsy, but in this case it really enhances the drama/tension of the film.
True Grit is not my favorite Coen Brothers film. It is a near perfect film, but not my favorite. The story is fairly simple: a teenage girl sets out to avenge her murdered father, with the help of a grizzled US Marshall named Rooster Cogburn and a Texas Ranger named LaBouef. The cast all turn in fantastic performances. Bridges in particular knocks it out of the park with his part. However, Damon does a fine job and Hailee Steinfeld holds her own well against the two. They often say working with kids is a kiss of death for a movie, because kids can't act. They can mostly play themselves. That really isn't the case here, but it's interesting because that character really isn't allowed to be a kid like she should be. She's forced to grow up fast to survive. Oh, and then there's Josh Brolin. He is the sought after killer, but he isn't in the film much until the end. He also turns in a solid performance as well. The dialogue in the film is entertaining and, surprisingly, played out for humor in a lot of scenes. The film is beautifully shot. Roger Deakins, who has worked on most of the Coen Bros. projects, is an amazing cinematographer.
I have one real complaint (Or Labouef, if you will). My complaint in this film is the pacing. The beginning and the film's final half hour or so is outstanding, and some of the best work I have seen all year. However, there are some sections of the film that are very slow paced, and nearly lost my attention completely. I know a lot of Westerns are like this, so I think it was done deliberately. This may be a case where I need to see the film again, now that I have an idea of what it is, so I can better appreciate those scenes. I was also really tired when I saw this, so there's that too. Other than that, I have no other complaints about the film. It is tense and exciting, and I would highly recommend it if you're considering seeing it at all. It makes me sad that Little Fockers won out at the box office this weekend. Nothing against that film, but it seems like America always chooses what they know versus seeing something different.

Fringe and The Friday Night Death Slot

Here's the deal. Fox has moved the show "Fringe" over to Friday nights. It's sad, really. Fringe is a really clever show that no one watches. Some of you who don't watch as much TV may be thinking "So? What does that mean?" I'm glad you asked. Fringe hasn't been pulling in great ratings this season. It's on Thursday night, for some reason. As good and clever of a show as Fringe is, there's no way it should be expected to keep up with other heavy hitters on Thursdays like The Bigger Bang Theory or Two and a Half Men. It's just not that show. It really needs to be on a night where it doesn't have to compete with that, and can build a fan base. Like Tuesday or Wednesday. So, Fox does what it always does when a show starts to lag in ratings- it moves it to Friday.
Now, this may not seem like a huge deal, except that the ONLY show ever to survive being on Friday was The X-Files. And that eventually got moved to Sundays. The truth is, people just don't watch a lot of TV on Fridays. Only the most dedicated and hardcore nerds do. Want proof? Here are some Fox shows that didn't make it on Fridays: The Adventures of Briscoe County Jr (1994), M.A.N.T.I.S (1995), Sliders (1997), Strange Luck (1996), VR 5 (1995) Firefly (2003), Fastlane (2003), The Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles (2009), Prison Break (2009), and Dollhouse (2010). There's a surprisingly long list of these shows over on Wikipedia. The reason I bring this all up is because now, Fox is claiming that they'll "Re-animate" Friday nights with Fringe. Call me a skeptic, but I have a strong feeling Fringe will be canceled by the time Fox announces its line up for the fall 2011 season. Usually with the same "It wasn't getting good ratings" line. That's because you moved it to Fridays, dickheads. Friday nights are a graveyard where shows go to die. Kinda like the summer season. So, RIP Fringe. You were great while you lasted.

Television's Most Hardcore Moments This Year

Admittedly, I watch a lot of TV. After watching last night's Supernatural, I thought I'd make a list of the most hardcore things I've seen all year, because a lot of what I have seen has been awesome. Here's the list. Oh yeah...spoilers. Lots of Spoilers.

True Blood: Russell's TV debut
This might be the most hard core thing I've seen...ever. It's that bad ass. What happens is that Russell, a really old vampire, goes insane after his lover Talbot is killed. He goes on TV to show people the "true face of vampire" and rips out the poor newscaster's spine.

Walking Dead: Zombie kill of the week
Hero Rick is walking through zombie infested Atlanta with a sidekick, as they try to get to a construction site to use one of the vehicles to make an escape. They camouflage themselves by smearing zombie guts all over them, to mask their living scents. However, it starts to rain and the zombies figure out what's going on. Rick makes a run for it, but not before nailing a zombie in the forehead. With an axe.

Vampire Diaries: Damon's "heart to heart" with Mason
Mason is/was a new character this season, and he's a werewolf. We all know that vamps and werewolves don't get a long, so it's no surprise that Damon immediately hates Mason. In this episode, Damon tortures him to find out what he and evil vamp Katherine are up to, ending with him ripping out Mason's heart. This leads to one of my favorite lines of dialogue all season, where Damon is taunting Katherine over the phone about what he did to Mason: "Yeah, Mason's right here, next to me. His heart's on the other side of the room, though." Awesome.

Supernatural: Sam makes a devil's trap out of his own blood
Sam has been hardcore this season, mainly because he doesn't have a soul, and therefore doesn't care about anything. They're trying to get it back, but...Anyway, in this episode, Dean, Sam, and Co storm a hideout of a demon named Crowley, who knows where Sam's soul is. They end up getting caught, but Sam escapes by making a devil's trap on the ceiling of his cell...with his own blood. Oh, and I forgot to mention that he made himself bleed by biting into his own wrist. Yeah, No-Soul Sammy is awesome.

And finally....

Sons Of Anarchy: Stahl finally gets what's coming to her
Stahl is an agent of the ATF, and she's been trying to bring down the Sons since the first season. She set up one of the characters (Opie) as a rat. As a result, Opie's wife Donna ends up getting killed. Now, Opie finally gets his revenge by killing Stahl in the same way- having her sit at the wheel of her car and putting bullets in the back of her head. It's very poetic.

Trailer Park: Part 2- Cowboys and Aliens

Somehow I overlooked this trailer yesterday. I think it's because I heard the title a while ago and thought "That sounds fucking stupid." I watched it today and found myself quite wrong. And pleasantly surprised. This trailer is easily the best out of the three I saw. It is also now my second most anticipated movie of next year, right behind Sucker Punch. Which by the way, looks like 10 buckets of AWESOME. Back to Cowboys and Aliens, whoever had the idea of putting James Bond and Indiana Jones in the same action movie is a damn genius. Despite how dumb the title is. On a side note, I saw Harrison Ford on Conan last night, and he looked like he had wandered in to Conan's studio while getting lost on his way back to the retirement home. It's sad really, Harrison Ford used to be one the best actors in Hollywood. Not to worry sir, I'll always remember you as Han Solo. He really holds his own well in this trailer. Unless the movie is somehow completely different than what's in the trailer, it should be a good time.

Trailer Park: Green Lantern and Red Riding Hood

Green Lantern
I'll be honest right off the bat- I know very little about this character. So, already I'm kind of filing this under "Movie news I barely care about". I think superhero movies have hit the bottom of the barrel. After doing comics that everyone knows about, like Superman, Batman, X-Men, and Spider-Man, they're down to these, that only the biggest of nerds will know anything about. Eh. As a movie, Green Lantern looks...silly. Not sure if that's what they meant. It seems like they're trying to go for a breezy Iron Man kinda feel here, but I have a feeling this is going to go the way of the Fantastic Four movies. By that, I mean it's going to suck. I couldn't tell you what this is about from watching the trailer, but I can tell you that this Green Lantern is what it would be like if Stiffler from American Pie became a superhero. Maybe that's what he's like in the comics, I don't know. I'm not sure if I will be seeing this or not.

Red Riding Hood
This trailer made me laugh the whole way through. It's an obvious attempt by the studios to cash in on the Twilight audience, the same way they did with Remember Me. This movie looks ridiculously stupid. Why, Gary Oldman, Why? Are your mortgage payments that bad? Also, there already was a movie where they "re-imagined" Little Red Riding Hood. It's called Freeway and Keifer Sutherland is a rapist in it. I'm not kidding, IMDb it. Since this movie deals with Werewolves, I wonder if said lychan is going to walk around the whole movie with his shirt off, and change in to a wolf that is 10 times bigger than he is. Granted, I know the director of this flick didn't do those Twilight movies, but those fx were awful. I wonder if this will be like the version of Little Red Riding Hood where the wolf eats the Grandma and then they shoot the wolf and cut her out. Don't remember that ending? Ask your folks. Anyway, I need to go to bed. It is late and I'm rambling. If you're so inclined, both trailers are up at the apple.com/trailers website. In case you didn't know, they have Beatles music now.

Due Date

Hollywood seems to run on a single rule: if something works, do it again. And again, and again, until the market is over saturated with whatever or whoever they're trying to shove down our throats at the moment. For example, I'm already getting tired of Zach Galifianakis. I saw him a few months ago in the bland Dinner For Schmucks. I suspected then that he may be a one hit wonder, and Due Date kind of proves me right. From here, it's only a matter of time until The Hangover 2 comes out, which is now shooting. It's a weird circle of life thing, where I loved the guy in The Hangover but may be tired of him by the time its sequel comes out.
It's nothing against the guy personally, it's the way Hollywood uses him. By throwing him into everything and having him play the same character every time, it gets tiring. He's funny, and in this film he even has some convincing dramatic scenes. Even so, it's like hearing the same joke told over and over. The same is true of his co star, Robert Downey Jr. When he was in Tropic Thunder a few years back, he hadn't been in a movie in a while. Seeing him in that was "Oh yeah, that guy. Hey, who knew he was funny?" Now we know. And we get it. This may sound crazy, but I think when someone is really great in a movie (as Galifianakis was in The Hangover), they should go away for a few years. Then come back with something and everyone would think "Oh yeah, that guy!" The film does have a great supporting cast as well, including Jamie Foxx and Juliette Lewis, but they're underused.
On the other hand, the movie itself is a tired formula. Remember that Kid Rock song where "Werewolves Of London" and "Sweet Home Alabama" are playing in the background? There is a similar effect going on here. Only this time, it's movies playing together in the background and they are Planes, Trains, and Automobiles and The Hangover. Both of which are vastly superior films to this one. Due Date has a few funny moments, and even some where I laughed out loud. In the end, those moments don't string together well enough to make a great film. It's not a terrible film, it's just not great. It's mediocre and forgettable. Certainly not one I would go out of my way to see again.

10 Most Disturbing Scenes

Sometimes around Halloween I do a list of my favorite scary movies, but that gets old. I saw a list on the internet today featuring the 10 most disturbing scenes in film over the last decade. I thought that list was kinda lame, so here's mine. Although, admittedly, I'm doing mine "overall" and not "the last decade". I'll try to indicate spoilers as I go. This list is mostly in order, but some of it is "as I thought of it." Enjoy.

1. Sweeney Todd (Spoiler)
Scene: The Oven Scene
What happens: Sweeney finds out that Mrs. Lovett was lying to him the whole time about the death of his wife, so he throws her into an oven and burns her alive.
Why it's disturbing: The whole throwing her into an oven part. That's brutal.

2. Reservoir Dogs
Scene: The Ear Scene
Why it's disturbing: For absolutely no reason other than to cause physical pain, Mr. Blonde (Michael Madsen), cuts off a cop's ear. And then talks into it. It's hard to watch.

3. Psycho (Spoiler)
Scene: They find the rotting corpse of Norman's mother in the cellar.
Why it's disturbing: It shows the depth of Norman's insanity. Killing your mom is one thing, but digging up her corpse and keeping it around because you can't accept the fact that you murdered her is a whole different bag of crazy.

4. A Clockwork Orange
Scene: Alex rapes a woman to the tune of "Singing in the Rain."
Why it's disturbing: See above. That song will never be the same for you after that. Unless you're an unfeeling sociopath.

5. The Dark Knight
Scene: The Joker's Press Tape
Why it's disturbing: I almost went with the "Magic Pencil" scene, but this scene, where The Joker kills an innocent person on tape and threatens to kill more unless Batman reveals himself is scarier. "Look at me!" Jesus.

6. Drag Me To Hell
Scene: Christine murders her cat.
Why it's disturbing: Christine is really a nice person and doesn't deserve a demon curse. It happens, and she ruthlessly murders her cat as a sacrifice thinking it will get the demon off her back. It just goes to show how far even the nicest person will go when their ass is on the line.

7. Saw (Spoiler)
Scene: Jigsaw stands up, he was alive the whole time.
Why it's disturbing: The whole movie, which takes place mostly in a shitty bathroom, these two guys who are chained there go through some awful stuff trying to escape. Also, there's a dead guy in the middle of the room, who you think shot himself during a failed "game." But it's really the guy who put them there, wanting a front row seat to the madness. Messed. Up.

8. American History X
Scene: The curb stomp scene
Why it's disturbing: Derek murders a guy by making him put his mouth on the curb and stomping down on the back of his head. It's a really messy way to do it, but it speaks volumes about the hate Derek has in him, which is very disturbing.

9. Seven
Scene: Sloth
Why it's disturbing: Because the victim here has been trapped in a room, chained to a bed, for an entire year. It's a horrific way to go, to slowly decompose while you're alive. It says something about John Doe, the killer, as to how patient and meticulous he is. Definitely a disturbing quality in a serial killer. It's not about the glory or grandstanding, it's about how much pain he can cause.

10. Silence of the Lambs
Scene: Hannibal's escape
Why it's disturbing: Hannibal kills a guard and then smuggles himself out by wearing the poor dead bastard's face. I can barely even comprehend it. It's just....ew.

There you go- the most disturbing scenes ever. See you in your nightmares!

The Simpsons Go Too Far

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DX1iplQQJTo&feature=player_embedded

The Simpsons used to be my favorite show on TV. I have the first 12 seasons on DVD, and the show was full of awesomeness. Around that time ( I don't know exactly where) the show jumped the shark. It started recycling old episodes, and it became clear that the show I once loved had run its course. I tune in from time to time, if a celebrity I like does a cameo or something. Mostly, I have moved on. Also, at the same time, I would like to point out that I have a pretty dark sense of humor. I can laugh at stuff that would make others cringe.
Even I have my limits. If you watch that link above, you'll see what I mean. I know that The Simpsons is made overseas (In Korea, I think). I never pictured it quite like that. I think that video was supposed be sort of an attack (or political statement) against 20th Century Fox. The thing is, The Simpsons have survived for so long because of the support of the network. By that logic, if Fox is guilty of allowing Dickensian workhouses to create their shows, than the creators of The Simpsons are, too. Where that intro is meant to be an attack, it comes off more almost as though the creators are proud of the fact that others suffer so they can have their millions of dollars in merchandising. It's kind of like if the Nazis made a video about the mistreatment of Jews...that was filmed in their own Concentration Camps. It's enough to make you scream "WTF?!?" That's a little extreme, but that's how I felt about it. I think the show has gone too far. This may be a case of "It's art, and I'm not smart enough to get it", but that last clip is one of the most dark, inappropriate, unfunny, and sad things that I have ever seen. For shame, creators of The Simpsons, for shame.

The Social Network (Or, How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Check My Facebook)

The Social Network is intense, fascinating, and one of the best films of the year. It's always about this time of year that I start putting together my list of top 10 films. Which ones I liked, versus which ones I really liked, and which ones I was indifferent towards. This one is easily in my top five. Nay, my top three. I personally never would have guessed that a movie about the creation of Facebook would be all of these things.
Part of why The Social Network is so fascinating, is because of how culturally relevant it is. I mean, you gotta wonder how many people were on Facebook while watching a movie about it. If that's not art, then I don't know what art is. You could even make the argument that this film is the defining movie of the decade. Again, because of how integral Facebook has become to our society. If it were to shut down for a week, I'd worry that our society was on the brink of Apocalyptic collapse.
This movie is also a testament to American Capitalism. Literally anyone, even nerds who spend their Friday nights typing lines of code on the internet, have the potential to become billionaires. The fascinating thing to me about this movie was its "who-stole-what-from-whom bickering. It attempts to paint Mark Zuckerberg as this evil-genius douchebag. Maybe he is. But there's no way he could have known from the beginning how big of a monster Facebook would become. If he was planning to screw all of his friends over from the start, as the movie suggests, I think that points to a very dark side of his character. That means he didn't do it for the money, he did it because Facebook was his, and no one would get in his way.
The Social Network is the best film director David Fincher has done since Fight Club. It doesn't hurt that he's backed by writer Aaron "The West Wing" Sorkin. The cast is also amazing. All the actors here bring their A game. Yes, all of them, even Justin Timberlake. Not only that, but it's a little freaky how much the trio of actors look like their real life counterparts.
As much as I said this film is a testament to American Capitalism, which celebrates that drive of the human spirit to succeed at all costs, I really hope a lot of people don't walk away from this movie thinking "Man, I really want to be that guy." It's possibly dramatic irony, but it's at least interesting to think that Zuckerberg, who created a network where friends could stay in touch with one another, seems to have few himself in the end.

Machete Has A Dull Edge

This was a really hard movie to review. Before going in, I was excited. I've been a fan of director Robert Rodriguez's work for a while. I loved From Dusk Til Dawn, Desperado, Once Upon A Time In Mexico, Planet Terror, and even the first Spy Kids movie. Rodriguez is a cool dude. I thought Machete would be an easy entry into the above list. Instead, the film left me really underwhelmed.
The first thing I noticed was that the cheesy-on-purpose Grindhouse style that the trailer promised us was gone. Did I walk into the wrong movie here? Nope, the thing is shot like a straight, modern, action flick. Major loss of points. I noticed there was another director attached to this, so maybe some of the film got handed off or something. The next problem is that everything we didn't see in that first awesome trailer is badly written filler material. It was scenes designed to set up/explain what we DID already see, barely giving us more than we already got. Then, there's Danny Trejo. This guy is usually awesome, a terrifying menace in the background. That one crazy guy who's always there that you wouldn't mess with. His stint on Breaking Bad is something I won't forget for a while. I don't know if he's camera shy or what, but when they put him front and center, he looks bored, and does not carry the film. The supporting cast is more interesting than him. And why not? It's got Robert Dinero, Cheech Marin, Steven Segal, Jessica Alba, Jeff Fahey, and Lindsay Lohan. You'll notice I didn't mention Michelle Rodriguez. That's because she's annoying and I can barely stand to look at her.

The point is with so much going for it, this movie was a let down. I wish they had shot it in the style of the trailer and fleshed out some of the plot. It's more of a whimper than a bang. It's a kid with a cap gun where it should have been a crazy psycho with a machine gun mounted to his motorcycle. Which, by the way, happens in the movie. I'm still a Rodriguez fan, and I really admire his guerrilla style of film making. I hope his next effort is better, and think this is a good example of why you make the film first, and then do the trailer.

Rating Tarantino's Films

Quentin Tarantino is one of my favorite directors. I recently read somewhere on the internet that a critic couldn't rate his films. I think I can, so here goes. BTW, Tarantino is always heavily involved in his productions by acting/writing/producing and such, but I'm only going with ones he directed.
As Oren-Ishii would say, "Silly Caucasian girl likes to play with Samurai swords."

7. Death Proof
I was actually really excited for this. Robert Rodriguez's part of Grindhouse was awesome, so what could be a better follow up? Unfortunately, after about 30 mins, this film becomes really boring. Maybe it was sitting through another 90 min film prior to this, but Death Proof did not do it for me, and I have no desire to see it again. Swing and a miss.

6. Jackie Brown
I've seen this a few times and I can barely remember anything about it, other than Samuel Jackson is in it, but he's not as bad ass as he is in Pulp Fiction. I think Michael Keaton was in this too, but whenever I think about this movie it's like waking up after a night of drinking. It's a blur.

5. Inglorious Basterds
Another movie I was excited about that fell kinda flat for me. It just takes too long to get to the point. When it does get there, it urinates all over history and the Jewish people. I know it's revenge fantasy, but if I were Jewish I would be pretty God dammed offended by this. Brad Pitt is awesome here but he's underused. Not a bad movie, but not great.

4. Kill Bill: Vol. 2
I could group Kill Bill into one, since that's how it was intended. However, they were released separately. We have yet to see the "Whole Bloody Affair" DVD we were promised, combing the two. Vol. 2 is closer to Pulp Fiction in tone, where as Vol. 1 is more like an action movie. It does have its moments. A favorite of mine is when The Bride fights Elle Driver in the trailer and pulls out her good eye, then leaves her alive. Some fates are worse than death, it's revenge at its coldest. Good stuff.

3. Kill Bill Vol. 1
I can sum up why I like this movie better than Vol 2. in 5 words: The House Of Blue Leaves. That fight scene at the end is bloody, epic, and creative as hell. The camera angles, the stunts, the color changes. Love it. Sonny Chiba's stuff is also a delight to watch.

2. Reservoir Dogs
Tarantino's directing debut. IMDB lists something called "My Best Friend's Birthday" as his first feature, but I've never seen it anywhere. So it doesn't count. My list, my rules. You can tell they shot this on a shoestring budget, but the gritty look of the film helps it. It throws you headfirst into that feeling of desperation that the characters have, that whole "WTF are we gonna do now?" thing. This film also has one of the most gruesome torture scenes I've ever sat through. You know which one I mean.

1. Pulp Fiction
This is one of my favorite movies of all time. I love everything about it. The dialogue, the acting, the out-of-order story structure. Which by the way, may seem like a gimmick but it gives the film's final scene a sense of real creepiness. This is because we know the fate of one of the characters. It reminds us that every choice we make in life will have consequences, no matter how random we think they may be. Sam Jackson and John Travolta have never been more awesome.

There you have it! I also would like to say that even though it seems like I was really negative about some of his work, Tarintino on a bad day is a hell of a lot better than some other directors on their best days. Think about it!